The “M” Word.....
No word causes a chill down the spine
of a woman of a certain age and an eruption of fire and smoke
coursing back up through the ears (and in my case, the mouth) more
speedily than the word “matronly”. I call it “the M word”.
The term matronly calls to mind by-gone era TV characters such as
Aunt Bea from “The Andy Griffith Show”, Edith Bunker from “All
in the Family”, Jessica Fletcher of “Murder She Wrote”, and
Marion Cunningham on “Happy Days”. Jean Stapleton was only 48
when “All in the Family” debuted. Marion Ross was a mere 46 when
“Happy Days” first aired. Yikes!
Matronly women wear their long gray
hair in a bun or short blue rinsed hair in tightly permed poodle
curls that are “blown out and set” once a week at the beauty
shop. They wear house dresses or pant suits that have elastic waist
pants and a matching top or mom jeans and sweatshirts with whimsical
appliques. To me synonyms include the motherly, stately, mature,
middle-aged, sedate, matriarchal, sexless, and boring. No woman I
know yearns to be matronly – with the exception of my younger
sister who thinks she has to dress “like a mom”. No animal print
underwear in that lingerie drawer!
Both of my grandmothers were matronly,
as were all of my great aunts. They were products of their
generation. They wore house dresses and sensible shoes. Neither my
mother or my mother-in-law or my husband's 100 year old grandmother
are matronly. In fact, according to my mother-in-law, neither she nor
Granda shop at a chain of stores that markets to women over 35
because they don't think the clothes are youthful enough! I am right
with them on this one!
We Baby Boomers don't want to become
matronly. We want to think of ourselves as fashionable, healthy,
physically fit, relevant and forever young. That is why we practice
yoga, train for marathons, join health clubs, and participate in life
affirming activities. We want to be the best we can be at every age.
We do not give in to the old expectations.
So, I refuse to become the “M Word”.
Nope....my hair is vibrantly red. I regularly try new makeup brands
and formulas & wear colorful chunky jewelry. I wear animal print
bras and thong panties. {I always wear my “fierce underwear” when
I am attending a mediation}, pencil skirts, tank tops, shoes with 3
1/2 inch heels (the stilettos were retired after my 8th
sprained ankle), empire waist dresses, and jeans that hug my curves.
There are no mom jeans in my closet. I watch “What Not To Wear”
religiously. My toes are always polished and I do not own the dreaded
A-line mid calf length heavy denim skirt that says “I haven't had
sex since 1992”. There is no M Word in my vocabulary.
Expunge it from usage! Instead....I opt
to use the “V Word” to described myself. Vibrant!
So, let's all substitute the V Word for
the M Word and celebrate being Vibrant!!!
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