In
the corporate world I’m currently befuddled, in flux, in limbo, caught between
the past and the future, leaving behind a job I love and have done well and
looking forward to the next position that I will assume likely sometime in
mid-March. I am embracing the
opportunity to do something new, to report to a regional manager I like and
respect, to work with new people, to explore a new corporate culture, to move
back into management.
Fifteen
years ago I decided that dealing with personnel issues in a crisis management
situation after the merger of two weak companies that were eventually sold off
and no longer exist that I would rather be responsible only for myself. I said
to myself – never again -despite knowing how foolhardy it can be to say
“NEVER”. But that was before I found
Al-Anon, embraced yoga, learned to mediate, found my spirituality in the beauty
of Nature and learned to live life on life’s terms and accept people, including
myself, for who they are. In the past 15 years I’ve grown, developed wisdom and
soft skills, courage, fortitude, self- knowledge and the appreciation of what
is needed to manage others.
As
part of the restructuring and integration of my newly formed employer post acquisition
by another insurer I will be assuming a new role. But for now it is business as
usual. I feel caught between the old and the new, the past and the future, the
comfort of what I know to the excitement of what is to come, the desire to move
forward with the acceptance that the change will come when it is time, the
regret that some people I care for are leaving or unhappy with the changes
versus the celebration that others I respect have earned plum positions in the
new company.
I
have allowed the uncertainty to affect my focus. My mind wanders. My
concentration is a bit off. I can read
the same document several times and still overlook the same error while
proofreading. It is frustrating. But I need to give myself a break.
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